The second occasion Doreen has just touched upon! The first was at
Christ Church, Oxford very many years previous. On the strength of past
theological training I was required to do no more than one solitary term
to qualify for the Anglican ministry; and during this, to preach at the
city’s prestigious cathedral. Well, whatever my shortcomings, preaching
was a gift I’d received from God and not from man! So with past Free
Church gusto, I preached from the pulpit with fervour, heartfelt emotion
and without notes.
But then, making ones way towards the entrance at the end of the
service, to shake hands with worshippers as they made their way out, I
overheard sly remarks. They came from a fellow whose feathers I appeared
to have ruffled. “All that outburst of enthusiasm and waving of hands!
Does he think we’re deaf?” And then, as I drew closer, the fellow said
to his colleague: “Shush, here he comes!” Then looking at me, he gave a
smile of insincerity and a pronounced ‘Good morning!’
Well, I did not answer. Having overheard his remark I merely stared
right at him in disgust and passed by. However, next morning at college,
the message had got around with much speed. “Your way of preaching a
sermon has very much offended the university’s Vice Chancellor!” Well, I
thought, he needs the gospel message as much as anyone else! A crawler
of a lecturer then wished to stir things up further against me. “You’ve
insulted non other than the university’s vice chancellor! This is most
unacceptable and needs to be gone in to.”
However, with a true spirit of protection, the Vice Principal of
Wycliffe Hall affirmed that my preaching talents - inherited from
previous Non Conformist days – were a blessing rather than a barrier, I
sense he knew, only too well, that other ordinands for Anglicanism
merely ‘read off’ a brief essay once they’d entered a pulpit. This was
their sermon! Sadly, - all these decades on! – little has changed; and
without a microphone, they’d be unheard.
Protesting against
Intensively reared turkey outside Chester Cathedral
My recollections of ‘Church Of England’ cathedrals have not impressed
me. Marble mouthed clerics; poker faced choirs, plus the flaunting of
academic robes and the array of titles - depending on one’s seniority of
rank - are amusing and so contrary to what Jesus of Nazareth stood for.
My wonderful past church organist David Windle - who has been MD on
cruisers such as the QE2, as well as Organist within the famous Tower
Ballroom of Blackpool – plus a regular musician for the Ken Dodd shows –
once visited a Church Of England cathedral. “I wish to see the
Organist!” he requested. The robed verger looked him up and down and
replied in an effected tone: “Ah, you mean the Canon Choral! Well the
Canon Choral is an exceedingly busy clergyman. I would strongly advise
acquiring an appointment with him!”
Well, my past church organist’s experience was far from unique:
within the last few months I attended a cathedral which will be nameless
to enjoy a lecture on the Ten Commandments. On arriving there, I was
just in time to witness one of the clergy introducing the speaker as the
Reverend Doctor Canon Theologian of the cathedral. Well I thought, ‘with
such a lengthy description I’m in time to hear a real in-depth study of
the subject to be discussed’. Well, at the end of her discourse I said
to myself ‘I’ve heard fart better from a lay preacher in many aback
street mission hall than this dribble’. And as for notes, well without
them this so called ‘Reverend Doctor Canon Theologian’ would have been
utterly lost.
However, my apologies: I’ve got rather side tracked! This hardly
relates to the needs of animals; though it does relate to the vanity of
that clerical caste who – if they knew their Scriptures fully – would
realise the Christian need to speaking up so as to defend them. Yes,
rather than be found eating the same aster ghrace! I tell you, such
puffed up, conceited clergy are as far removed from their Founder’s aims
and objectives as the moon is from cheese!
.
Animal Padre's
