The C.A.S.H. Courier Newsletter
Winter 2012 Issue

Peter's Humor

A couple walked into a diner, leading an alligator by a leash. The woman asked the host "do you have vegan options?" He assured her that there were many vegan options on the menu. The man then asked him, very apologetically, "Do you serve hunters here?"

"Sure do," said the host. "Great," replied the man. "Give me a veggie-burger, and a hunter for my 'gator."

At a fundraiser, the County was having an "ugliest man" contest.  When the local hunting club decided to do something good for their community by joining as contestants, the contest administrators rejected them all explaining "Sorry, no professionals."

Q- How do you know when a hunter is about to say something smart?

A- When he starts his sentence with "An anti-hunting activists once told me..."

Once upon a time, on a snowy, stormy Christmas eve, a good-natured, kind, and compassionate hunter named Joe and his wife Betty were driving along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being good-natured, kind, and compassionate, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the Eve of Christmas, Joe and Betty loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and Joe, Betty, and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Q: Can you figure out who was the only survivor?

A: Since there is no good-natured, kind, and compassionate hunter and no Santa Claus, -- it must have been Betty.

Q. Why does it take longer to build a hunter snowman?

A. Because you have to hollow out its head!

After a five-hour drive a hunter comes to his favorite hunting spot to find it posted with "No Hunting - No Trespassing" all around by the new owner of the property. Totally overwhelmed by the loss of his hunting opportunity and distraught, he aims his rifle at his own head. The owner of the property, seeing this, comes running out and yells "Please don't kill yourself-let's talk!" The hunter glumly replies: "Shut up - you're next!"

Q: Why do we include so many short hunter jokes in this column?

A: So hunters can remember them.

Fans of Peter's Humor...


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